“Marco Rubio is trying to steal my girlfriend,” said a still unidentified man who interrupted the GOP presidential candidate on Sunday at a campaign stop in Florida. Florida Sen. Marco Rubio, 44, had just taken the podium and was about to discuss the array of the shiny new Republican politicians supporting him when the man stood up and addressed the crowd. Rubio has failed to woo voters in crucial states during the GOP primary. He’s fighting for political survival in his home state, where rival candidate Donald Trump is heavily favored in Tuesday’s presidential primary vote.

“That’s enough. I have to tell everyone the truth: Marco Rubio is trying to steal my girlfriend,” the man says, in a video released by C-SPAN.

The audience erupts in laughter. On Twitter, a journalist speculates that the man is an actor.

“They met in New Hampshire, and she doesn’t look at me the same way anymore.”

Then the crowd begins to drown out the man’s strange speech with chants of “Marco, Marco.”

“We don’t beat up hecklers at our events, though,” Rubio says

“He’s [better looking] than me, it’s true. But he’s trying to steal my girlfriend. That’s the truth. You guys shouldn’t vote for him.”

Marco Rubio, surprised, scoffs as security ushers the man out of the room.

“I didn’t even win New Hampshire,” Marco says.

The crowd laughs. It’s funny, ‘cuz it’s true. Rubio tries to regain his composure.

“I , uh -- sorry -- I’m still looking for the hidden camera. So anyway..." he says.

Rubio told supporters that the election was a “referendum” on “our identity as a nation and as a people,” contrasting the aggressive and gowdy style of Trump to the presidency of Ronald Reagan. He pointed out that young, emerging Republican stars that support him grew up in the Reagan years. Governors Nikki Haley, Bobby Jindal -- who are exactly Rubio’s age -- and Susana Martinez, 56, have campaigned for him ahead of Florida's primary vote tomorrow.

“Who’s the young up-and-coming political leader in the Democratic Party? That’s right -- Bernie Sanders,” Rubio says.

Wait, I think I see a pattern. I jest, I would point out that the winners in New Hampshire seem to be the least likely to steal a young man’s girlfriend. Trump trounced Rubio, and Sanders buried former Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley (whose abs would have made for a good running mate, if not an entire presidential cabinet). This is also technically true of young, hot, Barack Obama who lost the state in 2008 and -- technically -- won it in the next primary after aging about 20 years. In fact, even expressing support for some New Hampshire primary winners can cost you a relationship.