If You Cheated Once & Feel Bad, Should You Tell Your Partner? Experts Say No!

Common knowledge suggests that honesty is the foundation of any relationship. But is the "truth at all costs" really healthy for you and your partner? According to experts, if you've cheated on your partner once and feel remorseful about it, then you should keep this information to yourself.

According to psychotherapist Deborah Duley, if you know that the incident is not something you will repeat, then honesty is not always the best policy. Of course, when you confess, you clear your conscience. But, going forward, the question you must ask yourself is, “Will it help your relationship?”

Dr Ruth Westheimer, a 91-year-old sex therapist who has had decades of experience, tells us that it is best to keep one-time indiscretions to yourself. Honesty at all costs is a myth. So, if you open up to your partner about your one-time affair, the chances are that it will create a damaging impression. Also, it might also hamper the probabilities of you having a long-term and fulfilling relationship.

But that being said, if you do see yourself in a long-term relationship with your partner, you must discuss your indiscretions with them at some point in the future.

Once a cheater, always a cheater is a false statement. Also, just because you cheated once on your partner, doesn’t make you a bad person. When we talk about cheaters, there are various types of them who do what they do for a plethora of reasons. For instance, some cheat because they enjoy the act. It gives them an adrenaline rush, a high that leaves them craving more.

And for some, the attention they receive does wonders to their self-confidence. They start feeling special and desirable, which is something they were lacking in the first place. However, here's something we need to take note of: people cheat because of the situation they are in, and it is not something embedded in their personalities.

For instance, if you cheat under the influence of alcohol and are filled with remorse later, then it would be a mistake to disclose the incident to your partner.

The most important thing when you make this mistake is to ask yourself why. If you think the reason is connected to the problems that you are facing in your relationship, then it is best to talk to your partner and resolve it. It will ensure a healthier relationship. However, if it was merely a momentary weakness or a one-time affair, it’s best to keep it a secret and move ahead in life.